A Journey

This Christmas has been a journey for me in more ways than one. We took the entire break and drove down to be with family. We had to carefully schedule our days to maximize time with each side of the family AND have time with friends. I have really struggled lately with trying to figure out where I belong.

I know I don't belong in the town I went to high school in. I still have loved ones and some wonderful friends there. I have some of my longest standing friends there, but, it doesn't feel like home. I truly just feel like a visitor, even though, I could tell you where everything is and where everyone still lives.

We then went to another side of Georgia. I know this isn't my home because I have never lived there. We have been lovingly invited several times, but, we don't belong there. It is always nice to visit and see the family we have there, however.

After that visit, we went back to the town we spent our entire married life in. We were welcomed back with open arms by some more recently made lifelong friends. However, there were so many changes in just six months, I was astounded. It kind of felt like home, but, it was more of a "this is where I came from" feeling. I am very excited to be here and get to see the friends and family we left in this town. I am happy for the love we have been shown since we have been here. It lets me know, we belonged when we were here.

The last leg of our journey begins in about a day and a half. I can honestly say, I am ready. I am no longer struggling with where I belong. I know where I belong. I belong with my family, wherever it is. I belong where God has placed us. I belong where I am. I am making a difference where I am. I am making new friends where I am. I am building new relationships where I am. Will they take the place of the old differences, friends, and relationships? NEVER! I have just been given a wonderful opportunity to replay things I have done before in a new setting. :)

'Tis the Season...

For me, it is the season of rush around and try to get everything done! Oh my goodness! I do, truly, love the holidays, but, they can be stressful. We get started right after Thanksgiving getting ready for...not Christmas...BIRTHDAYS!!! Nathan and Matthew were born on December 8th after 19 hours of labor and THEN a C-section. They got to come home from the hospital on December 11th...just in time for their Daddy's birthday on the 12th.

I have to plan a birthday party, get birthday presents, and figure out how to treat my husband well for his birthday, also. It gets a little stressful! I try to do it all with a smile. The boys just had a sleepover with some of the new friends they have made here in Ames. They invited six boys. Four were able to come. I limited them this year. Last year, we had a dozen boys. It was still exhausting! I usually plan their birthday for the weekend before their birthday so, I don't have to overlap theirs with his.

For Chris, I usually try to either take him out to dinner, or fix him dinner at home with the kids and some of his favorite goodies. Of course, there are presents for Daddy, too. I refuse to wrap any birthday presents in red and green paper. There are no Santas on the boys gifts. I want their birthdays to be distinct from Christmas.

I established ground rules years ago for my December birthday people. I said, first of all, there are TWO children, they get TWO presents. Second, their birthday is in December, it is a BIRTHDAY, not Christmas. If their birthday was in July, they would get presents in December and July. The get two DIFFERENT presents in December. I don't like combination birthday/Christmas presents. That seems so unfair to me. I try to abide by that for Chris, too. I am sure there are some people who would wonder why it is a big deal, but, to me, it is. I want them to have separate, unique experiences.

This is the first year our tree has been up by the first of December. I told Chris when the boys were little that I would not put a tree up until after their birthday. I didn't want Christmas to come first. I told him that when they asked we would do it. They asked this year. They even decorated it themselves. My little boys are growing up.

Daylight Savings Time

WOW! It was dark here by 5:00 and pitch black by 6:00. I will like driving to work in some daylight, but, it will be difficult to get used to the darker evenings. 6:30 feels like 9:00 right now! It gets darker here earlier than in TN, so, I am going to have to figure out how to reset my internal clock so I don't feel like a total night owl!

I woke this morning at 6:30. UGH! Who wakes that early on purpose?! Only people who got to "fall back". When I woke, I heard three of the four children already downstairs playing games on the Wii. Abbi came and got in our bed. Of course, she had already awakened me in the middle of the night. At exactly 1:45 AM, I heard, from her room, across the hall, "I said to stop it! BENjaMIN!!" I guess Daylight Savings affects all of us :)

The sun was to set today at 5:02 PM. That is soooo early! I guess we can start eating dinner by candlelight, just to set the mood for the holidays. It is going to feel weird to be grading papers, making the kids do homework, or cooking and cleaning with it so dark out. However, once the snow hits, I know I am going to love looking out on a moonlit night and seeing all the sparkly little crystals reflecting the light!

I Like Halloween

I like Halloween. Oh my goodness! Did I really just say that?! I mean, my husband is a minister! I was raised in church! What am I thinking? Seriously. I LIKE Halloween.

I think it is fun. I don’t let my kids dress like ghouls or murder victims. I let them dress fun or silly. The boys liked to be superheroes for a while. Abbi loves being a princess or fairy. It is fun to let them dress up and do makeup.

I like candy! I don’t take the kids candy, by the way. They are usually pretty generous. Benjamin told me last night he was giving me some of his candy because he wanted to take care of me “really well”. J I have no problem with my kids going and asking people for candy because it is the only time they are ALLOWED to go and ask people for candy!

I understand why many churches have begun their own traditions, as long as they are for the right purpose. It bothers me when they say they are there to keep kids from worshipping the devil. I think ANY holiday can be what you make it. There are safety issues nowadays that people worry about. We didn’t have to worry so much about them when we were kids. This year was the first that my oldest two were allowed to go without us. However, they were with two friends and had three cell phones between them. The youngest two still had to go with Mama and Daddy.

I figured out something the other day. There is another really good reason why I like Halloween. It almost makes it feel as if fall is over and winter is beginning. For me, it also signals the Holiday Season. Once Halloween is over, we have Thanksgiving and Christmas to look forward to! Now the fun REALLY begins!

Raising Twins V

One of the most pleasurable things about having twins is getting twice the love. Nathan and Matt have always been loving boys. Nathan will tell you right now that he is a "Mama's Boy." He left for school the other morning, got about half a block down the road, turned around and came back because he had forgotten to hug me. That made my day.

The boys not only love me, the love their daddy, their siblings and their grandma. They fell in love with their sister when she was born. They were only two, but, SO protective. We were in a store once and Abbi was riding in the stroller. Some little boy came up trying to touch her. Well, her "big brothers" would have none of that! They both came over and started grunting at him and pushing him away! However, I did have one problem with them when she was little. They NEVER left socks on her feet! She would be in the swing, happy as can be and the boys would go by and take off her socks. I am not quite sure why they did this, but, they did it constantly.

Now, the love they have for their sister is different. They take care of her in different ways. I have seen her wake up in the morning, come downstairs and curl up in one of the big boys lap. I have seen her stop at the third stair up on her way down, hold her arms out and her big brother wrap his arms around her and carry her to the couch and sit down with her. Do they fight? You better believe it. They can annoy each other to death.

I am looking at them right now. Abbi is sitting on the couch with Matthew. They are watching TV together. She has her legs stretched out across his. She just laughed at something he said. They look after her when they play outside. I really worry about when this girl starts dating...any boy she chooses has a LOT to live up to :)

Why Read?

If you walk in my front door, the first thing you notice is the built-in bookshelves. I was very excited to find these in our house. In the last house, we had two floor to ceiling bookshelves and they were full. Technically, these shelves have two sets of four shelves each. However, I have too many books for that. We have books going all the way across the top of the shelves and lined on the floor using the floorspace as extra shelving. These shelves are FULL. Nothing broke my heart more than having to take FOUR bins of books to the used book store to divest myself of before our big move.

Books are lined up all the way across our shelves, with books sitting sideways on top of the other books. I can't help it. I love books. I love book series. I love for my kids to read books and book series. I will admit, we do have a shelf and a half of DVDs on these bookshelves, but, I also have books all over the house. There are several books in my room. My mom has a bookshelf in her room with some of my books on it. My daughter has a bookshelf in her room with a lot of books on it. My sons all have books in their rooms.

I love to read. I read anything and everything. I run the gamut among authors. I read from many different genre. I have favorite Christian fiction books, and I have read the Twilight series. I like Dan Brown, Dean Koontz, and John Grisham. I have several favorite Christian authors from different genre, as well. I read and re-read books by Tracie Peterson, Janette Oke, Judith Pella, and Frank Peretti. I don't listen to other people's opinions about books. I want to find out for myself. I hear hype and controversy, and then I have to read. I want to know what has people up at arms. It never fails to amaze me that no matter what I read, I learn something.

I do not let my kids read just anything they feel like. I have read all of the Harry Potter books, the Percy Jackson books, and others in that genre. I read them because I wanted to read them first and decide if my kids should be allowed to read them. I like to read books for content to see if I approve of them for my kids. Have I said "no" to books? Yes. There are some that I don't think my kids are mature enough to read yet.

I am proud of the fact that I am multi-faceted in my reading. My kids are multi-faceted readers. I like to read before I go to sleep. It relaxes me. My two oldest boys have gotten into the habit of reading before they go to sleep. I see books beside their beds and it makes me proud. I don't just see books. I see novels. They have read classics like David Copperfield by Charles Dickens and new classics like the Harry Potter series. They read quickly and absorb all. Matthew learned enough on the history of Egypt by reading FICTION that he is now a unit ahead in Social Studies!

In my personal opinion, if it gets a kid to read, let them read it. I don't think that all kids should read anything they feel like. Of course there is plenty of trash out there. I KNOW that there are books I have read that I do NOT want my kids to read. This is one reason why I read before they do. I feel like as long as a piece of fiction is not challenging my personal beliefs or those I am trying to instill into my children, then, they should be reading. I discuss books with my kids. I talk to them about what they are reading. They WANT to share with me and ask me questions as they read. This is why from the time they first start school, teachers comment on their vocabularies. They are well-read and well-spoken because I have taught them to love reading. They know the value of it. They enjoy the experience. They learn while having fun. I am so proud that they read and like it!

Public Schools vs Homeschooling

I teach in a public school. I always have. I have always wanted to. My children go to public schools. I am a product of public schools. My husband is a product of public schools. It really bothers me to hear people bashing public schools and talking about how much better homeschooling is than public schools will ever be.

First of all, before anyone gets offended, let me say, if homeschooling is the choice you made, more power to you. If you have the finances, time, organization skills, and energy to homeschool your children, good for you! It is not something I would enjoy, nor prefer to do. I like teaching one subject, and teaching older children. I can tell you right now, my youngest would make me insane were I to try to corral him and teach him multiple subjects by myself.

I understand some people's reasoning for choosing homeschooling. The ones that bother me are the "religious" ones. "I don't want my child exposed to that", " I don't want my child being a product of the world", "I don't want my child to hear some of the things they will hear in public schools." I ask this, where did Jesus minister? Where would He minister? Public schools are my ministry and my children's ministry.

I get to be a living breathing example of Christ every day in a public place. I get to show my students God's love by being an example of His love. I get to show compassion and teach the Word without ever saying a word. My students know where I stand and how I believe without my ever having to preach to them. How? Because I LIVE it in front of them. They know I go to church, they know I don't use profanity, or give in to a lot of the temptations they have seen. I answer direct questions, but, I do not automatically tell my students how I believe. That is not what I am there for. I am there to be an example. I am there to live a Godly life in front of them. I am there to show them God's love in action.

My children are a light to their world. How do I know this? Because they tell me. My youngest is six. He was explaining to his Daddy this morning (I had already heard the story) about his friend at school who does not believe in God. Benjamin continues to tell him that God is real and God does exist. It is our job to teach them about God at home, which we have done and to put them where Jesus would have been the rest of the time.