Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Overprotective Brothers, Peer Pressure, and Yoga Pants...

As many of you may know, I think my daughter is beautiful. She's beautiful inside and out. She has a heart of gold, most of the time. She's an animal lover and a people lover. I've had teachers tell me when she walks in a room, she just lights up the room. I'm proud of her. She's hard working and earns good grades. She has a LOT of friends. I'll ask who she is texting and it's a different name all the time (explains the 2,400 text messages for her on last month's bill...). Anyway, she's growing up and things are really starting to change.

Abbi was in sixth grade last year. Her brothers have always been protective of her. The rules are she goes nowhere alone (our rules). At least one of the big boys goes with her to the park, playground, riding bikes, etc. The boys know this and respect it. They understand the reasoning behind it. They are big boys. Bigger than some full grown men at 14. They like the idea of being protectors. They have also carried it a bit far at times causing their sister to want to murder them in their sleep!

One of the first weeks of school, I was given a warning by the boys. They informed me that their sister was NOT ALLOWED to wear yoga pants to school. Now, I agree with that. I have no problem preventing her wearing them to school. I don't like seeing them at my school, to be honest. I just thought it was funny that THEY came up with that rule. They told me it was "too distracting" for girls to be wearing them to school. I was impressed with how mature their thinking was at 13 (at the time).

Well, fast forward nine months. Abbi's friend wants to make a "music video". She wants the girls to wear t-shirts and yoga shorts. Remembering the boys' rule (and my own), I reminded Abbi that it wasn't appropriate. Her friend was REALLY laying down the pressure and being nasty about it, too, saying things like, "Your mom has no fashion sense, anyway." I told Abbi it was time to get off the phone so I could re-evaluate that friendship. She quickly got off the phone. She later tried again to convince the friend that there were alternatives. They came to a compromise. The shirts HAD to be long enough to cover their behinds. Well, the whole thing fell through, so that battle ended. I'm proud of Abbi for sticking to her guns and standing up for herself. I know it's hard.

The big boys are still being overprotective, though. I'm waiting for the big meltdown, any day, now. Abbi was getting ready to go to the store with me and putting on her makeup. Matthew says, "Abbi! You're TWELVE!! You don't NEED makeup!" She had on a short shirt-dress, Nathan checked to make sure she has shorts on underneath it. They've both been on her about her friends, clothes, makeup, and other things this summer. I told Chris he was going to have to do something when her meltdown comes because this is a monster that he's created. They've followed his example and learned from him.

To be perfectly honest, I love that Abbi's brothers are so protective. I know I don't have to worry about her as she gets older and starts high school. She'll be able to know ahead of time the kids who will be good influences or bad. Her brothers will watch out for her and make sure she's safe as much as they can. I have known since they were tiny that they adored their sister. They wouldn't even let strange kids come near her stroller when they were two. They will still pick her up and carry her around. I'll see her cuddle up with them and they wrap their arms around her. I hope I have done everything I can to foster that closeness for their entire lives.

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